It has been officially two months since I had my scary bee incident. The doctors told me it would take me this long to just get back in to my daily routine. I am proud to say that I accomplished that at about 6 weeks out. About a week ago I was talking to a friend and he said that I sounded like I was 105% Joy. I kind of agree. Although I have been very physically weak, I have a different clarity to my actions throughout the day. This incident has helped distill priorities both personally and professionally in my life that maybe weren't as evident previously. Beforehand - EVERYTHING was a priority, and work was #1 above anything personal. I have always been a natural workaholic. Having that separate a little allows me to put more energy and focus into the truly important things, and enjoy everything I do a lot more with less stress. Today, two months out, marks a couple of milestones for me. First, it marks the start of my physical re-training regimen. Six weeks in a mostly horizontal position sure has knocked all of my physical fitness and strength out of me. Two weeks ago, just sitting up felt like exercise and made me sore, let alone carrying gas/PFDs for practices, and walking to the bays and back - whew that's a lot of work! I also have noticed the grade of sidewalks more than ever recently when walking Bundle. It's a big step to now actually be TRAINING again. It feels great and is tremendously difficult at the same time, but I'm glad I'm able to do it. Fitness can be regained. Secondly, I start my allergy treatments tomorrow morning. I have to say I'm just a tad nervous about how I'll feel after these, but I know I'm in good hands. Today, I truly feel like I'm looking forward and moving into what will be and away from what has been in terms of this experience. You know what they say - leave things better than you found them. Give me two more months, and I think I'll be better than I was before.
Joy Update 10/9/13
A week ago I got the all clear from my doctors after having a stress test/ECHO done. My organs seem to be functioning fine after all the trauma of the bee venom, adrenaline/steroid infusions. The tests also show that my fitness is worse than it has probably ever been. Lying in bed for 5 weeks definitely has untrained everything about my body - muscles, tendons, lungs, heart...etc. Even sitting up all day is a workout right now. Being up and mobile for practices I lead takes everything out of me, so I don't think I'll be doing any running/rowing myself yet for a while. I need to get up to speed with daily life activities first. As far as my recovery goes, I look back to normal, and sound back to normal, and even sometimes function like I'm back to normal, but I sure don't feel back to normal. It's like I'm me, but I'm not me. It takes so much energy for me to be normal me for a few hours. It takes so long to recover from doing anything. It's very frustrating. I'm also terrible at planning out my days/week at the moment. I think I can do everything, but then I realize I can't function at 100% Joy speed, or that I have to just stop mid-day and crash. I'm still figuring everything out, and hopefully I will continue to get better each week. The doctors weren't kidding when they said this would effect me for a long time. Guess we'll see if I can handle coaching my youth team followed by coaching my adult team, and then watching the pirates game tonight. Normally I'd be doing 5hrs of work in the office before all of that.
Joy Update 9/23
This week I'm trying to go to work every day for a few hours. Just doing office/computer/behind the scenes work, but it's good to feel useful again - although my usefulness is limited to my brain and typing fingers at the moment. It's going to be a bit boring as anytime not at work is spent at home recovering in horizontal and sitting positions. Still occasionally have low grade fevers that are mostly controllable with Tylenol. The one thing I'm still dealing with that I can't take medicine to treat is the most limiting factor - my heart. The incredible doses of adrenaline they gave me, and I'm talking crazy amounts as I've finally seen my full hospital report (not including the ambulance report), I think really messed my poor heart muscle over. Anything I do makes it pump out of my chest and ache and hurt. It keeps me up at night, it works its way into my dreams and rarely goes away, but definitely gets worse with sitting up, walking, or just carrying my bag to/from the car. After activities like these I automatically put my hands on my chest and press inward to try to contain the thumping and pressure. I can't imagine any activity beyond these simple daily movements at the moment as I think they might do me in entirely. Then there are the sharp pains that happen randomly throughout the day as I'm sitting and talking to friends/coworkers, driving, or just eating/watching tv. If you see me wince - this is why. It's highly annoying and, honestly, a little bit worrying. I'm definitely not ready to deal with these pains while in a coaching launch in the middle of a river with 40+ people relying on my leadership. The doctors say that all the blood tests are normal and that my heart sounds normal, but it just doesn't feel right. Maybe this is one of the things about my recovery they said would take 2 months to get over? I thought I was emotionally through dealing with the trauma, but I guess that was only stage 1. I am truly okay mentally; I'm very rational and joyous as usual and my foundation in God is solid. I just might be a little darker than usual on certain subjects; a slightly different perspective these days.
Joy
Update 9/18
I have successfully been working at
the boathouse since 10:45am this morning! Even ate at my desk - ah the joys of
a "normal" work day. There were some painful moments that regulated
slightly with a little floor-time with Bundle. I feel so much better mentally
knowing that I can start managing my teams, at least from afar. I was only
going to stay today until 2 or 3pm, but decided to stay longer so I could say hello to my First Row
girls before their practice. I love those girls so much! The Dr Pepper
definitely helped me stick around longer today. It is now time for me to drive
home and crash for the rest of the night. Happy to say that my brain is
probably 85% back, although the rest of my body is still under 50%.
Joy
Update 9/16
Today I actually went to work - as
in driving into town and working! When driving, my brain tells me I can't have
any distractions, so no music. It's amazing how long the drive seems to take
when all your attention is on the actual act of driving. Upon arriving, it was
so great seeing Megan, Jenn, Rick, and Nate. They have been so incredibly
supportive of me and have taken on even more
work as they all split up all of the things I usually do these past three weeks.
The whole boathouse has been painted with a fresh coat of paint - my office
included. A nice way to start a fresh new life of sorts. I am kinda glad I
wasn't around for that ordeal. After some mild organizing I was able to get my
"head in the game" a bit. I did some office/computer work and briefly
caught up with what's been going on with the teams. After passing hour two, I
was hurting. Pain everywhere, fever creeping up on me. It was clear I would not
be able to be vertical for much longer. Driving home was painful, but I got
through it. Then I immediately went up to my room and crashed. Apparently there
is a 1:1 relationship of working hours to sleeping recovery hours. Now, awake
again, it seems I still can't get horizontal enough to recover. Maybe I need
one of those upside-down hanging devices. All in all, a successful day. I will
repeat this effort on Wednesday. Tomorrow I think I will still be recovering.
Joy
Update 9/13
For the last two days I've forced
myself to be awake during the day and only slept at night. I actually feel a
bit human again. Moving definitely is difficult still, but I feel more
motivated to try it and push through the symptoms that come afterwards. I think
that means I'm getting better. My vision is pretty much back to normal finally,
so I drove to Target today for my first out-of-house
excursion. It was a success, and although I feel exhausted and achy I'm excited
about trying my next excursion soon. I'm three weeks out from the bee incident,
and the doctors said it would take 2 months to recover. However, I'm Joy Nix,
so that can't be correct. I'm stronger than the normal person. I'm not going to
rush things that can't be rushed, but I will rush the things that allow
rushing. Still lots of rest and recovery to go, but I have some motivation
which I lacked before, so life is beginning again.
Joy
Update 9/6
Today I actually made it to see the
allergist. He amazingly helped create the immunization therapy for honey bee
allergies back in the 1970s at Johns Hopkins. Definitely the right guy to see.
He's actually seen others with the hypersensitive anaphylactic shock reaction
like mine despite how rare it is to see. He said to expect these lingering
symptoms for about two months (numb skin,
vision/hearing differences, headaches, weakness, fatigue, blood pressure
issues, foggy brain, random sharp pains...etc). Not that this is a good thing
to hear as I definitely don't like the idea of feeling like this for that long,
but it's nice to know these weird things I'm feeling are kinda "normal."
I just have to put up with them, and ask other people (and myself) for patience
as I get back to being more Joy-like again. The doctor definitely recommended I
go through immunization treatments starting in December as I am so sensitive it
would be quite careless not to take that precaution against the possibility of
getting stung again. Those consist of weekly treatments for about 20 weeks (for
a case like mine where they have to increase the dose very slowly) and then
monthly for 2-3 years. This would then last about 5 years until I would need to
do any further treatments. Ah the fun to look forward to. Silly little bees,
causing all kinds of trouble. Now I'm off to sleep again. Thanks everyone for
the well wishes, prayers and thoughts!
Joy
Update 9/4
Today I spent a long time at the
doctor's office and lab which wiped me out. Good news is that my heart and
kidney are okay. They think the enormous dose of adrenaline that was pumped
into me may have temporarily messed up my adrenal glands from producing enough
regularly. Should regulate over time and waiting on more tests to know details.
This afternoon/evening took a turn up. My friend Valerie Testa came up and brought
delicious tomatoes and cucumber from her gardens. Just what I needed - both the
visit and the veggies. Gave me some great energy for the evening. Today was the
first day I did not have a fever ALL DAY! I also started feeling much more
myself this evening. I missed me a bit, so it was good to see her back. Bit by
bit I'm gonna win this race.
Joy
Update 9/3
Fever subsided for the majority of
today. I can only handle incredibly limited activity before I feel weak,
dizzy/light-headed and nauseated, but today was an improvement at least. I've
taken a field trip to my mom's house for the evening. Slumber party!!
Joy
Update 9/2
Today was better than yesterday. Off
the steroids, on the antihistamines. Sleep is less broken, so feels more
restful. Crazy dreams. Takes many hours horizontal to recover from a few
minutes vertical, but at least I got up a bit today. G'night!
Joy
Update 8/30
I successfully laundered my sheets
and got them back on my bed. It's been an all day event, but it's nice to have
accomplished something. I'm trying to do a bit here and there between naps -
working to keep resting, but also build up my endurance for existing out of
bed. My body is pretty good at telling me when to shut it down.
Joy
Update 8/28
Still have a low grade constant
fever, headache and constant gross sweating, but am feeling less foggy in the
head and less achy all over. I seem to be able to do something for about 30
minutes and then crash hard. Steroids are definitely helping. Doctors orders
are lots more rest. I'm happy to obey
